Job openings at Manny Ramirez Facts:

Due to explosive growth in readership, and our superior eyeball monetization ratio, we here at Manny Ramirez Facts have discovered that we have some acute needs for additional staff. We have the following positions open:

1. Lead Programmer: MRF, LTD seeks a lead programer to be stations in our South Seas office. Key responsibilities include:

*Maintenance of Cray T90 Ramirez Modeling System (RMS)
*Codification of Black Sock / Sandals policy
* Interfacing Ramirez Database with ORACLE-based CMS

Applicants should have the following experience:
*Fluent in Fortran 77 (NOT Fortran 90, we hate dynamic memory allocation)
*BMI >= 26.7
*Languages spoken: Klingon, English, Spanish
*College Degrees in Theater Arts not required but strongly recommended

Compensation: Comensurate with experience, neckbeard.

Interview to be conducted via Second Life. No Furries.

Please contact the author in the comments if interested

2. Marketing Lead: MRF, LLC, a Delaware corporation, seeks two to three talented individuals to lead our domestic and international marketing efforst. Key responsibilities include:

* Representing the Manny Ramirez Facts brand at any and all sporting events (not limited to Curling, Volleyball, Ultimate Frisbee, Competitive Full Contact Jenga).
* Displaying custom MRF logos from posterior subdermal ink injections on nationally televised events.
* Strategize with MRF senior management on our plush, Italian leather sofa.

Applicants should have the following experience:
* 2-3 years client management at Scores/Spearament Rhino or similar institution of discerning taste.
* Certified advanced user in Access
* Minimum 75 score on Army Physical Fitness test.

Compensation: Commensurate with experience, perkiness.

Interview to be conducted in our offices in Logansport, Indiana complex, room B1.

Please contact Sean Robinson at his mother's house.